Walmart's bass is 9 yuan per jin,
If it's dead and on ice, it's 7 yuan for two,
just as fresh. Brother so-and-so gets off work,
and rushes to buy it, but it's often bought by others,
so he stands in front of the fish tank waiting;
sometimes none die for quite a while.
Brother so-and-so then uses a net to catch them and hits the fish on the head with the handle.
The staff really can't bear it anymore,
and comes over to say to him:
"Sir, the ones that faint don't count..."
15. Pirated CDs:
- Are you serious?
- No, I'm kidding.
Movie translation:
- Are you Shilaris?
- No, I'm Keating.
1. A certain company employee was promoted to supervisor and soon got a female colleague pregnant. The young supervisor already had a wife, and afraid she would find out, asked the female colleague to abort the child, but she insisted on keeping it. Helpless, the young supervisor told her to go back to her hometown in the northwest to give birth.
The female colleague asked, how will you know after the child is born?
The young supervisor said: That's easy. After the child is born, just send me a postcard with the words "Shaanxi ramen" on it, and afterwards, I will regularly send you living expenses.
Ten months later, one afternoon, the young supervisor came home, and his wife handed him a postcard from Shaanxi.
He calmly took the postcard. But when he read the words on it, he immediately foamed at the mouth, convulsed, and fainted. His wife immediately called 120.
In the emergency room, the doctor asked the wife: We have checked your husband and he has no heart disease, so why did his heart suddenly fail and he fainted? She replied: I don't understand either; he only reacted this way after reading the postcard.
The doctor took the postcard and read aloud: Shaanxi ramen, four bowls; two bowls with sausage! Two bowls without...
Comment: This woman sure knows how to give birth. Let's see how he gives the living expenses.
2. A colleague, initially wanting a boy, had four daughters in a row, and only the fifth was a son. Now he really works his life away, day and night; whenever there's an opportunity for overtime, he never refuses. One day we were chatting, and a guy said to him: “Save some energy, don't overwork your body.”“Ouch, I'm not like you guys. With so many kids, how can you not endure a bit of hardship? Unlike you, only one child, now you're living in comfort.”
A guy nearby chimed in, “We're comfortable now, but you were comfortable back then too!”
Commentary: In a nutshell: having children is just the pain left over after the joy.
3. Lying lazily on the bed with her, she used a voice from a commercial to act coquettish, saying, “I'm your Youlemei~” I was so happy I couldn't help my eyes from lighting up: “Wow, that's great, I've already inserted the tube!”
