The summer we went through was filled with the scorching smell of scorched earth in the air. The slowly drifting breeze still carried heat. The sunlight became exceptionally clear in the afternoon, penetrating every corner with great force. It was inescapable.\
Mid-summer. Various inexplicable thoughts. Living each day with a sense of anxiety. Irritating, irritating, irritating.\
Seventeen birthdays passed amidst the blessings of many friends. Still no cake, no big celebration. I'm used to it. It always feels natural. So, it's comforting.\
The youth with white clothes and black hair reappears in front of people, carrying years of joys, sorrows, and emotions. The once childish face has now become angular. A week of neglected shaving leads to a wild growth of beard. People are always surprised by his changes.\
Little dimples. Small eyes. Ordinary features that bring immense joy. Black pupils awaken white memories. Youth leaves too many traces. Too many vows were made once. But reality is always intertwined with pain.\
Everyone has a secret in their heart. We unquestionably choose to bury the most painful memories inside. But we never think about what happens if one day this secret is uncovered by someone else, exposed under the sunlight. How would we feel?\
Seventeen years, seventeen springs and autumns, yet not a single summer has led us to adulthood. The gears of time seem to have dropped their chain; the clinking reminds us of our past. I remember past people, past events, and past words echoing in my ears. One hug, two familiar smiles. I remember the warm declaration on Christmas Eve.\
Actually, I miss you a lot. I miss the you that belongs solely to me.\
The optimistic child still sheds lonely tears in the dark night. Past and present always evoke reflection. No matter how painful the wound, it will heal under the nurturing of time. But unexpectedly, after half a year, it is still impossible to wash everything away. I feel sad, you know? Like a child alone for seventeen years, who becomes lonely again after experiencing half a year of happiness. No one will care. No one will ask if he is happy.\
I just want to have a complete you to receive everything I can give. No disturbance. No worries.\ After stumbling along, we finally realized that it's not that everyone can't live without someone, it's just that life is dull without you. It's not that we can't shed tears, it's just that we've gotten used to crying through sleepless nights when no one is watching. Grief. Grief. Grief.
