(Premium) {laugh} Funny replies collected over many years {2}! Don’t blame me if you laugh until it hurts!

1. 'No matter how noble your sentiments are, I will not praise them; no matter how degenerate your morals are, I will not be moved. In this age where verification codes are required everywhere, one has no choice but to get a membership. Before, I also read countless posts every day, but basically did not reply. Later I realized this was very silly, since many people who registered after me had higher levels than I did. I finally had an epiphany. So I saved this piece of text in a notepad, and every time I read a post, I would copy and paste it once.'

2. 'There are always 28 types of commenters: 1 watches from the first few rows, 1 passes by, 1 leaves their name, 1 immediately curses “LZ go die, LZ SB!”, 1 constantly fights for the second floor, 1 just drifts by, 1 only knows how to say “hehe”, 1 comes in and doesn't post anything but bumps posts to the top, 1 doodles, 1 posts ads, 1 acts profound all day, 1 is an emoji king, 1 fiddles and sleeps when bored, 1 wants to pet the dog on the floor below, 1 worships constantly, 1 brags, 1 despises those who brag, 1 promotes Brother Chun, 1 floods the thread, 1 is annoying, 1 claims to save face, 1 teases flirtatiously, 1 says the content is too long to read, 1 rambles, 1 asks what to prepare for KFC every day, now also 1 asks about a 4-yuan Nutritional Express, 1 asks for a PS expert, 1 joins membership for experience rather than for the original poster, and the last type is like me, copying and pasting to get experience.'

3. 'As the first floor, I feel a great sense of responsibility. If I don't reply, the poster might think they're playing a single-player version of Skynet. Besides, I have to pet the dog on the third floor. The reason I don't pet the dog on the second floor is that I'm afraid a grandson will fight me for the first floor, and I might accidentally pet myself. So… third floor, stick out your head quickly. Good. 0'

4. 'Who wrote the final works of the Shi family, the unrhymed “Li Sao”? Answer: Sima Qian, a eunuch! A member of the eunuch faction! Who improved papermaking and passed on human civilization? Answer: Cai Lun, a eunuch! A member of the eunuch faction! Who sailed far and displayed national prestige thousands of miles away? Answer: Zheng He, a eunuch! A member of the eunuch faction! Who posted this water thread, hoping for replies from lovers of fun? Answer: The original poster, a eunuch, a member of the eunuch faction!'

5. 'Medicine! Medicine! Medicine! Check it out! Having a buddy, don't show off! Medicine! Medicine! If you have a buddy, come show off, you won't find a girlfriend. Find a girlfriend and show off, even if you find one, you'll break up again. Medicine! Medicine! Check it out!'Everybody! Hey black dog! True friendship is the real way, everyone sing with me! Verb great mercy, verb great! I say buddy, you say 'yes'! 'Buddy' 'Yes' 'Buddy' 'Yes' Check it out, check it out! Finding a buddy feels great!!!! 6. Medicine!! Medicine!! Medicine!! Check it out!! Anti-mother long baby enough!! Dong-ci big bestow, dong-dong big bestow, dong-ci big bestow, dong-dong big ci…!! Wan, vomit, break, Buddha. Who is singing!! Dong-ci big ci!! Warmed the loneliness!! Dong-ci big ci!! White clouds float by, the blue sky remains… Medicine!! Medicine!! Black is a dog… Check it out~ 7. 'Dew wets the sandy wall, evening quiet, dawn silent. Mud unclear to see through, damn mud wall.' (Note: this reply may cause a conflict with the original poster) 8. 'After reviewing the Encyclopedia Britannica, Baidu Library, Google Databases, Chinese Historical Encyclopedias, and a series of other references, and conducting joint research with multiple biologists, medical scientists, and genital experts from the Chinese Academy of Sciences and the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences, I concluded that everyone is stating a fact the original poster does not want to admit: Original poster, you have no jj.' 9. Pictures and J8 are inseparable. If there is a picture, you can talk about J8, if there is J8, you can talk about the picture. Without a picture, you cannot mention J8; without J8, you cannot mention a picture. Only when both picture and J8 exist can the relationship prove the viewpoints of both. Any action without J8 and picture is untrustworthy. We look at pictures through J8, and use pictures to verify J8. Both picture and J8 are indispensable, J8 depends on the picture, and the picture affects J8. No picture, how can you talk about J8! 10. If Pan Jinlian didn't open the window, she wouldn't have met Ximen Qing; not meeting Ximen Qing, she wouldn't have cheated; no cheating, Wu Song wouldn't be forced to Liangshan; if Wu Song doesn't go to Liangshan, Fang La wouldn't have been captured and the Song dynasty would be established; there would be no Jingkang humiliation, no Jin invasion, no Qing dynasty; no isolationism, no Opium War. The United States wouldn't be a superpower, China would be the only great power in the world, all other vassals would be insignificant! Jinlian, what the heck are you opening a window for when you have nothing to do? 11. A monk happened to pass by here, saw the original poster bragging…bewitching people, endangering beings. The old monk, heart devoted to Buddha, with kind intentions, cannot bear it at heart, and takes pleasure in helping others, upholding the spirit of respecting the elderly and loving the young. He can only pick up a rotten branch, take a deep breath, and then suddenly stab it into the original poster's chest, chanting, 'Benefactor, I top your lungs.' 12. Damn!Every time I see this kind of post, I can't help but sit cross-legged, lower my breath to my dantian, and with red lips and white teeth, coldly spit out one word, 'Do.' Then I leap into the air, flip three times, snap my fingers and shout the word 'You,' followed by a sweeping move that clears thousands of soldiers, using the momentum to jump back and stand on a tomato, saying the final word 'Sister.' Successfully replied, applause, work done. 13. Young friend, I see that you are brilliant and have a unique physique; you will surely succeed in the future. Now I will give you a small test: transfer 10 coins to my QQ account, and then we can talk about saving the world. What do you think? 14. Qilin let out a loud roar: 'Mingming! Don't leave!' The captain was stunned: 'Qilin… didn't you love me?' Xiao'er was hit hard: 'Captain! What should I do!' Purple's face was streaming with tears: 'Xiao'er… my heart~' Shenhua pointed a knife at Purple: 'Purple! I will die to show you!' Xiaocheng immediately hugged Shenhua: 'No! Don't be foolish! You still have me!' Canyang painfully hugged his head: 'Xiaocheng, you're actually fragile…' L陌 looked at Canyang, then rolled his eyes and fainted. The innkeeper ran to L陌, crying and calling out to him. Xiaoming took a few steps back and said: 'Innkeeper! Let him go immediately, or I will jump off the cliff!' The village chief walked up to Xiaoming and said tenderly: 'I will go with you.'