This is how the on-demand version originally responded initially

In this world, there are many fools. Among them, the biggest fool is called 'Second Floor.' Why is this Second Floor considered a fool? Because he actually wants to fight me for the sofa! How can a tasteless, poor person like him have the qualification to compete with someone as great as me for the sofa? Let me tell you, grabbing the sofa is a noble and sacred act, and only a very few people have the qualification to do so! For example, me! Look at the person on the second floor, that creepy appearance, see his dark forehead, his improper tongue coating! Look at his dark circles! Look at his prominent cheeks! This is clearly the sign of someone who masturbates 10 times a day! Look at his smile, his smile is cruel yet lecherous, lonely yet proud, foolish yet cocky! This is clearly the sign of masturbating while watching a Spring Brother concert! I tell you, never forget the person who owns the sofa, he will always be your pride! And never forget the person who owns the second floor, he will always be your shame! Let us unite! Eliminate the second floor! Support the sofa! You foolish Second Floor, still want to resist? Haha, someone like you, when exposed to my dazzling light, do you think you have a chance of turning things around? Quickly install a titanium-alloy dog-eye to avoid being blinded by my godlike light! Here I laugh and pat the head of the Second Floor dog without saying a word!

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