1. In high school, my deskmate loved to fart.
Once, a foul smell wafted over. I asked him: "Did you put poison gas again?"
The girl at the front desk turned around and said: "His smells not like this."
2. Roommate A: "Do my new clothes look good?"
Roommate B: "Wow, such good-looking clothes, why don't you go and match them with your whole look?"
Roommate A: "..."
3. The sound system in the dormitory next door is awesome.
Once I asked them: "Hey, the speakers inside are good, what brand are they?"
"Not only are the speakers good, but they also have dual SIM cards and dual standby."
4. I originally wanted to post a comment on QQ space: Oh my god, I drank too much again tonight!
Seeing that the recent visitor was a mother, I changed it to: The exam is about to take place. I have been reading for a day and I am so tired. Come on!
5. My deskmate fell asleep while doing papers, and farted in his sleep with an earth-shattering sound, and the smell was extremely unpleasant.
Everyone suddenly stopped writing and looked at him, but he had no intention of waking up.
Looking at the teacher's livid face on the podium, we all tried our best not to laugh.
But at this time, my deskmate actually talked in his sleep. He just smacked his lips and said, "It's so fragrant and delicious!"
1. I have loved playing with water since I was a child. Dad said that this kid has a connection with water and will definitely be a good swimmer in the future, which is really good.
It turns out that my dad's words were somewhat predictive, and as a result, I am now a car washer.
2. Five years ago, I confessed my love to the girl I loved deeply.
She patted me on the shoulder and said, "Be mature, don't be so naive.".
Five years later, I have matured, become rich, and find that I am very happy now.
If you are willing to spend money, there will be many girls who will make me happy.
Not long ago, she asked her best friend to tell me that she actually still has feelings for me.
I told her: "Be mature, don't be so naive."
3. When it was time to review, I found that some people's heads were printers, tape recorders, and digital cameras.
Only my head is a soymilk machine.
4. The younger brother said to the older brother: "Brother, it's time for you to find a partner!" When asked why, the answer was: "Our mother's standards for you to find a partner have been lowered again and again!"
Five years ago, our mother hoped that you would find a gentle, virtuous, beautiful and pleasant partner;
Three years ago, my mother said that you only need to find a serious girl;
Two years ago, you need to find a woman who has both arms and legs, who is not stupid and not stupid, she can be divorced or has children;
A year ago, she asked for two things, 1. Female, 2. Living;
Now, just satisfy a little of the above two points!
5. The hard week is finally over! Everyone, please recharge your batteries and welcome the overtime work on the weekend!
