1. Bajie: "Brother Monkey, the white dragon horse has been a little weird recently. Every time I joke with it, it will roll in the mud, and then run a few steps to pull horse dung."
Wukong: "Idiot, the little white dragon can't speak. What it means is: Mud horse, go to shit..."
2. After Zhu Yuanzhang established the Ming Dynasty, he saw the great general Xu Dagong and shocked the master.
Once Xu Da contracted gangrene on his back and was forbidden to eat steamed goose. Seeing that the time had come, Zhu Yuanzhang sent a decree to give Xu Da a steamed goose.
Xu Da understood Zhu Yuanzhang's intention, ate it with tears, fell to the ground and cried: When the birds are gone, the good bow is hidden.
Zhu Yuanzhang chuckled, shook his head and said: No, in my hometown in Anhui, this is called a ladder that must be placed sideways when not in use.
3. "My eyesight has declined very much recently. I wonder if I have any eye disease."
"Have you seen a doctor?"
"Yes."
"Then what?"
"I didn't see clearly."
4."When I saw you, you looked like a knight."
"Which hero do I look like?!"
"You look so good. Like Yang Fan, his body is like Dalba, his IQ is like Guo Jing, his behavior is like the Six Immortals of Peach Valley, his education is like Miejie Shitai, his gender is like Dongfang Bubai, and his voice is like Yue Buqun.
\5. A man collected seven dragon balls. Unexpectedly, the dragon suddenly fell from the sky and asked loudly: "Whatever wish you have, I can help you realize it?" "
The man suddenly sat down on the ground and yelled: "Fuck you! I'm scared to death! "Then his wish came true...
1. I took my niece into a taxi. My niece insisted on playing with my mobile phone. After getting off the car, my niece asked very proudly: "Auntie, guess where I hid your mobile phone? "
I smiled and asked, "Where is it hidden? "
"The car is hidden! ! "
2. The neighbor moved, and my son ran over to me and said, "Mom, I just saw the neighbor's aunt carrying three pans." "
I smiled and said: "Do you think of Big Big Wolf? "
The son said: "Yes, that uncle is so disobedient and prepared so much." "
3. The mother gave her 8-year-old son 5 yuan to buy slippers. The son turned around and ran to the vegetable market, bought 5 yuan of lean meat and sent it to his grandma's house.
Grandma was so happy that she kept praising her. My grandson was filial and immediately gave him 10 yuan.
4. I introduced a partner to my cousin. When my cousin came to my house, when we met, my daughter asked her: "Auntie, where did you dress up so beautifully?" "
The cousin said: "It's a blind date. "
The daughter asked again: "Is blind date fun? "
My cousin replied with a smile: "It's not only fun, but also delicious. "
Unexpectedly, my daughter took these words to heart.
On Sunday, my daughter insisted on going out to eat fried chicken, but I refused by saying, "I can't eat junk food."
My daughter looked at me and said dissatisfiedly: "Humph, I will go on a blind date tomorrow to eat delicious food and have fun, but I won't take you." "
