1. When I was at work, a girl from the company went out to do errands. When she came back, she brought a few bags of original melon seeds, which she shared with everyone in the office.
I said I like milk-flavored food and won't eat this kind.
Then the girl said: "This is easy to handle, just put it on my chest and cover it."
2. There was a TV announcer who liked to be innovative when reporting news and often made jokes.
One time, the news broadcast included the content of "the plane hovered in the sky for a week and then left." She thought she was "colloquial" in the wording of the news, and she only heard her say: "the plane circled in the sky for a week and then left!"
3. Colleague A: The box office of "囧 in Thailand" exceeded 1.1 billion, which is amazing.
Colleague B: Is it as high as "Avatar"?
Colleague A: "Avatar" is in 3D, so the effect is good, but the ticket price is expensive. Who would go to the cinema to watch Wang Baoqiang in 3D?
4. Today I was looking at a piece of clothing on Taobao. There were three reviews, two of which were neutral and one was positive.
The content of the moderate review is roughly: it is different from the picture, there is color difference, and it does not look good when worn.
The content of the positive comments is: I bought it for my classmate. He is very ugly in his clothes. I am very satisfied.
5. It was the last carriage to catch the train. He ran and ran, and finally arrived.
He handed the ticket to the conductor out of breath, and the guy said seriously: "It's not this car!"
He was immediately dumbfounded and said, "Really?, why not?"
After a second of silence, the conductor suddenly burst into laughter: "I lied to you, you really believe it! Hahaha..."
I was so scared that my heart jumped out of my head, this new generation of conductor.
6. Recently, the strong wind has cooled down. A colleague's rheumatism recurred and the leg pain was unbearable. He went to see a doctor. The doctor told him to keep his legs warm.
So he bought a pair of thick down pants and put them on. His colleagues all laughed at him.
He said seriously: "This is called 'people warm their legs and dogs warm their mouths.'"
Everyone laughed wildly. He turned around and saw the director standing behind him wearing a big mask...
