1. The mother asked Pippi to get up: "Get up! The rooster has crowed several times!" Pippi said: "What does the rooster's crow have to do with me? I'm not a hen!"
2 The father told his daughter about how she often went hungry when she was a child. After listening, the daughter had tears in her eyes and asked sympathetically: "Oh, Dad, did you come to our house because you had no food?"
3 Tongtong asked her mother: "Why do you call Mr. Jiang 'ancestor'?" Mom said: "Because 'ancestor' is a name for the dead." Tongtong said: "Should the deceased grandmothers be called 'fresh milk'?"
4 Mother often told Xiaomei: "Don't swing on the swing when wearing a skirt, otherwise, the little boy will see the little underwear inside!" One day, Xiaomei happily said to her mother: "Mom, Xiao Ming and I had a swing competition today and I won!" Mom said angrily: "Didn't I tell you? Don't swing when wearing a skirt!" Xiaomei said proudly: "But I'm so smart! I took off my underwear so that he can't see my underwear!"
5 The daughter was very curious about the belly button, so she asked her father. He briefly explained the reason why the umbilical cord connected the fetus and the mother's body. He said that after the baby left the mother's body, the doctor cut off the umbilical cord and tied a knot, which later became the belly button. The daughter said: Then why doesn't the doctor tie a bow?
6 Xiao Ming went to his grandma's birthday banquet. When it was time to eat birthday buns, Xiao Ming asked: "Why do we eat birthday buns like this butt-shaped buns?" Everyone's expressions changed greatly after hearing this. Then Xiao Ming opened the birthday bag, looked at the bean paste inside, and said, "Grandma, look! There's still poop in it!" Everyone fainted and vomited.
7 Father: Pierre, don't go to school today. Your mother gave you two little brothers last night. Just tell the teacher. Pierre: Dad, I only said that one was born. I want to save the other one for next week when I don't want to go to school.
8 Father Buck was sitting on a bench in the park and resting. There was a child standing next to him for a long time and never left. Buck was very surprised and asked: "Little angel, why are you always standing here?" The child said: "This bench has just been painted. I want to see what you look like when you stand up."
9 There was a little boy who asked his mother after school one day: "Mom, where did I come from?" The mother felt that this question was difficult to answer, but she should take this opportunity to educate her children. She took cats and dogs as examples and talked hesitantly about the process of reproduction. After hearing this, the son was confused and said, "How could this happen? My deskmate said he was from Shanxi!"
10 My two-and-a-half-year-old daughter often says some ridiculous things. One day while watching Africans dancing on TV, she suddenly asked: "Mom, why didn't this uncle wash his face?"
11 Mom: Pierre, do you want to eat a cookie? Pierre didn't respond, so his mother asked again: Pierre, do you want to eat a cookie? Pierre said: I want to eat, mother. Mom said: Why do I have to ask you twice? Pierre: Because I want to eat two pieces.
12 Little boy: I want to buy that sanitary napkin. Waiter: Did your mother ask you to buy it? Little boy: No. Waiter: Is that your sister? Little boy: No, I want to buy it. Waiter: Why are you buying sanitary napkins? Little boy: I watched TV and said: With it, you can swim, skate, and play tennis.
13 Xiaomao went to kindergarten. One day, the teacher asked: Who knows how many countries there are in the world? Xiaomao said: I know! The teacher said: Then tell me what countries there are. Xiao Mao said: There are two countries, China and foreign countries!
14 The boy was having dinner at his aunt's house, and his aunt cooked fish for him to eat. The child said while eating: This fish is so delicious, it would be even better if there were no thorns!
15 The six-year-old daughter asked seriously and solemnly: "Mom, does the table have legs?" Mom: "Of course it has legs, otherwise how could it stand up?" Daughter: "Then why doesn't it walk?"
16. The son said: The baby squatted in the mother's belly first, and then crawled into his *mouth. The mother spit at me, and the child came out!
17. The baby was sleeping, and a mosquito flew onto his butt. The father drove away the mosquitoes and applied some toilet water on the baby's butt. The baby woke up and shouted: Mom, the mosquito just peed on my butt!
18. I took Xiaodou to play by the city wall. Xiaodou suddenly saw the children who were sketching. He looked at them for a long time and then asked me: Uncle, they must be very poor, right? It takes so much effort for them to draw like this. Why not buy a camera? How convenient that would be!
19. Mom, how did I grow up? Lele asked curiously, looking at the photos of her childhood. When my mother heard that the opportunity for education had come, she said: You were raised by your mother with poop and urine. Lele cried when she heard this: How can you give me this? Woo~~
20. At night, my parents were playing the video they took for my brother during the day. My brother came in and saw it and suddenly shouted: Piracy! He rushed up and turned off the TV, and then he slapped his chest seriously and said: Don't watch pirated copies, if you want to watch them, watch the genuine ones.
21. I rented a house in the east of the city. The landlord had a six-year-old son who was naughty, smart, and cute, and was especially known for his ability to imitate. Since I was still young, I often had advanced quotes and actions that came out, so I recorded them and it was a pleasure. When I returned home the next day, the landlord's son saw me and confidently pointed to me and said that it was this uncle who told me. It made his father dumbfounded. It turned out that the landlord's son was dissatisfied with the food and kept eating cat meat before I came home. Ask why. He said that after eating it, he could grow long white hair like his beloved kitten. Oh, I know, yesterday the little guy asked me why I had so much hair on my legs. I told him that it was because I ate pork and the hair on the pig grew.
22. When the baby was two years old, he went to the aquarium with his aunt to see marine life for the first time. When his aunt asked him what kind of fish was in the tank, she always answered: braised fish.
23. Beibei accidentally cut his forehead, and his mother applied some purple liquid to him. Sai'er, who was painting, saw it and asked: Who painted on your head? What a badass!
24. When eating steamed buns at home, the baby said to his father: Give me a steamed bun! Dad said to Miaomiao: Don't say Baobao, say Baozi. The baby nods to indicate that he has remembered. At night, the baby suddenly pointed at his father's arm and said: Dad, your arm was bitten by mosquitoes!
25. When eating, Beibei took a napkin and dipped some soup in the bowl. Then she gestured to her father's nose and said in surprise: "Hey, there's so much snot in my nose."
26. My colleague's daughter is less than three years old. One day, a colleague woke up from a nap and found that the child beside him was missing. When he turned around, he saw the little thing sitting in front of the dressing table, smearing her face with her cosmetics and putting on a big red lip. He smiled at his mother and said, "Do you think I am as fair as milk?"
27. My little nephew loved to sleep when he was a child. He once slept until the sun found his face. Screaming: Turn off the lights! Turn off the lights! After telling him it was the sun, he shouted impatiently: "Turn off the sun!"
28. One of her colleagues had a 6-year-old daughter who started to lose her teeth. Her mother took her back to the work after the tooth extraction. My mother asked her: "Does the tooth still hurt?" The little girl's answer made the people next to her laugh: "Oh, the tooth was left in the hospital. I don't know if it hurts or not!"
29. My little niece is now 4 years old, and there are a lot of interesting things. . During the Chinese New Year family gathering, her grandma taught her how to give a toast all afternoon. At the dinner table in the evening, her little nephew picked up the wine glass and started: "Well, first of all, I wish grandma, grandpa, um, um,... drink~~" She fell down on the spot and she forgot all about it:) Later, her grandma said to her that she was in good health and that her work was going well. Now she felt energetic. She came one by one and went around in a circle. It was not enough, so she said to wish her one more time:)
30. I went out to school and went back once a semester. I went to my sister's house for the first time after returning. My niece had just finished her nap and she didn't scream when she saw me. The whole family said: "Uncle loves you the most, please call me uncle.""The little guy pretended not to hear and refused to scream. So I agreed with them to pretend to ignore her. Everyone was chatting and no one asked her. After a while, the little guy came over and pulled my clothes and said, "Uncle." I pretended to be angry: "You didn't call me just now. It's too late now!" She looked aggrieved and said, "Uncle, I wasn't awake just now, so I didn't recognize you..." I fainted on the spot~~