Father asked me what I pursue in life?\
I answered money and beautiful women, and my father fiercely slapped my face;\
I answered career and love, and my father appreciatively patted my head.\
——Diary Excerpt May 17\
I remember one day not long after graduating, my girlfriend sent me a text: "Let's break up!"\
I hadn't even had a chance to be sad, when she sent another: "Sorry, sent to the wrong person." Now I could be completely heartbroken…\
——Diary Excerpt August 15\
Master, please relent for the old monk!\
A very long time later…\
Master, please have mercy on the old monk!\
——Diary Excerpt July 23\
Dealing with a vicious person requires being more vicious than him; dealing with a despicable person requires being more despicable than him;\
Dealing with a suave person requires being more suave than him; dealing with a handsome person requires… destroying his looks!\
——Diary Excerpt July 24\
The lesson my last relationship taught me: never date a girl who loves spicy food.\
Every time after having spicy hotpot with her, when we got intimate, I would painfully recall a song: "Burn, Phoenix!"\
——Diary Excerpt May 23\
My principle is: if others don't offend me, I don't offend them; if they do offend me, I get angry!\
——Diary Excerpt May 23\
Suddenly remembered in college, the teacher assigned a couplet: The nation prospers, the family prospers, the country prospers.\
The class committee wrote the lower line: Heaven is vast, Earth is vast, Heaven and Earth are vast!\
Later I was kicked out of the classroom…\
Because my lower line was: Your MA, his MA, your his MA!\
——Diary Excerpt May 24\
Accidentally saw in a book the so-called modern woman's criteria for choosing a partner: must have a car and a house, parents dead.\
Depressed. So I wrote down my imagined wife criteria: family wealth over a hundred million, beauty unmatched in the world, virtuous, gentle, sexy, father-in-law with terminal cancer…\
——Diary Excerpt July 17\
Life, you can't hang yourself on just one tree; you should try dying a few times on some nearby trees.\
——Diary Excerpt June 18\
I just realized, the way to attract a man is to make him never get it; the way to attract a woman is exactly the opposite, you must keep satisfying her.\
——Diary Excerpt September 8
