What does the heart really want?

_____When alone in the sparse quiet, I picked up my pen and drew a bare heart. I deliberately tried to shape it completely, but right after I felt it was finished, I pierced it with the pen.
_____Because it seemed to remind me of its fragility the moment I created it. It is not in its original place… I wondered in my heart, why does it make me want to draw it? Why is it bare? And why, after satisfying it, does it still feel unsatisfied? What exactly does a heart desire?
_____Tilting the pen slightly, I wanted to use thick strokes to highlight the shadows, but as my eyes followed the tremble of the pen, I saw thin extra lines being constantly emphasized, forming its 'wounds.' Suddenly, I felt that what it needs is the same as what many people need.
_____It needs not to merely look glamorous yet be empty; it needs a pen that can fully express itself; it needs paper suitable for spreading out; it also needs, perhaps, not to be a heart alone. Right, it would need not always being alone; it would need someone always there to listen; more importantly, perhaps, it needs an emotional companion?
_____It needs—to be fulfilled. So it reveals itself without regard for the consequences from the very beginning. Someone saw it, but did not notice… so the effort it made did not bring the reward it expected. That is why it makes me feel its disappointment… but did it understand? Even if you fully reveal yourself, even if inside you are pure, how often do others truly pay attention? On the contrary, others will just lose interest in you out of habit. Including me.
_____Perhaps only the heart knows its own suffering. Revealing oneself means facing a fate of being ruthlessly pierced.
_____Tidying up the paper, there is no extra space to fill on this sheet. Let it go to where it belongs.