A year ago, my love ended, and it has been a full year and 25 days now. That was the first time I truly fell in love with someone. Although everything about him was short-lived, 13 months and 13 days from acquaintance to separation, the memory is fresh.
There was no romance at all in the beginning with him. Wu was a mutual friend of both of us. One time I went to her house to play cards, but there was a shortage of three, so Wu recruited him with just one phone call. When he came in, he was wearing a dark blue shirt, black trousers, and high prescription glasses, looking very elegant. Wu introduced us to each other, and we felt like we were very familiar friends, but we hadn't seen each other for a long time. Young people always get to know each other quickly. He and I played against each other. My poker skills were not good, but my luck was good, and we cooperated very well with him. After that, we had several contacts, mostly under Wu's invitation. We all got together to play and relax. Through occasional chats, I learned that he also lives alone in this city and does not have many friends. Wu's husband is his college classmate and a very good friend. When a person is bored, he comes to her house to have a meal. "Sometimes I really wish to have a home like the Wu family, and cook, eat, quarrel, and go shopping together with a loved one. It must be very happy." When he said this, he was a little intoxicated in his imagination, with a kind of yearning intoxication. I used to think that only girls could say such tender words, but it was the first time I heard a big boy say it. If he touched me, it might be that moment.
I don't know how we started to have a single line of contact. Anyway, when we appeared in front of Wu hand in hand, she and her husband were very surprised, but they seemed to be expecting it. Later, he told me that he liked me because of my willful and easy-going contradictory personality. After many chats, he found that I am a person who understands love and feelings. God knows what I have done to make him feel this way. Anyway, we fell in love like this, and our love is burning. In the beginning, we talked on the phone every day, holding on to the phone like all people in love. Our work places were far away, but we always squeezed in the bus for more than an hour after get off work to go to a snack street the same distance away from us to eat and take a walk, and then went home separately. Sometimes due to traffic jams, the one-hour journey may take two hours, but we have no complaints about each other. Being able to smile at each other and eat together after a day's work is enough to offset any unhappiness.
Three months later, we moved in together. Originally he didn't agree. He said that he was responsible for me and could only live together after we got married. But I can't reluctantly let him go after eating every day. It seems that every day's farewell is a kind of torture for me, although we will meet again the next day. This time, my stubbornness and willfulness left him helpless. Then, we registered our marriage. There was no ceremony, just family and friends from both parties gathered together to get to know each other briefly. We have always believed that the so-called rituals are for others to see, and we are not capable of extravagance. We believe that with love, we will have everything. We are finally living the life he said: cooking, eating, arguing, shopping with a loved one and never getting tired of it. The two people always have surprisingly unified ideas and often have the same views on things. Of course, there are occasional disputes, but they are just small embellishments of life, and they will be lost if they are ignored. When I sleep next to him at night, I often wake up from laughter, and then look at him next to me and don't want to go back to sleep. There were many nights when I couldn't sleep because of him like this - his frowning forehead, occasionally calling my name in his sleep, and then unintentionally stretching out his arms to let me curl up in his arms... Every morning when we go to work, we always hug each other and say goodbye. This has gradually become a silent habit for us, just like eating every day, it never falls behind. He goes out half an hour before me. He always picks me up from the bed and watches me clean up for a while before going out to work.Occasionally, he would make exceptions, and he would lift the quilt in a bad way and shout: "It's been exposed. I am helpless and happy to let him tease me."
Later, in order to facilitate contact, he gave me my first mobile phone. It was the most expensive gift he gave me besides the wedding ring. After that, we texted each other every day. As long as we were not together, as long as there was a slight gap, we would say something that made each other's hearts beat, and greet each other's lives. That kind of intimacy and care was like a jar of old wine, making us intoxicated with each other, and the lingering fragrance was leisurely.
Once, I went to Tianjin to visit a friend. I told him before that I might have to stay at his friend's house for a day or two. He was a little reluctant but nodded and agreed, and reminded me not to turn off my phone and to contact me at any time. My friend lived in a simple basement, and since we hadn't seen each other for a long time, we chatted for a long time that night, very late, and we only got tired around 3 or 4 o'clock. When I was about to fall asleep, I was disturbed by a "dong dong" knock on the door. Who? So late? When the door opened, he and another friend were standing at the door. Seeing me, I slid down the door frame as if paralyzed. My face was pale, as if something terrible had happened. I was frightened and hurriedly squatted down to support him.
"It's all to scare you," my friend who was traveling with me said to me, "He sent you countless text messages, but you didn't respond. He called your cell phone when he got home from work in the evening, but he was never in the service area. He thought something had happened to you, so he asked me to drive him all night to come here to find you. I said it was okay, but he still didn't believe me." Only then did I realize that the signal in my friend's basement was not good, and we had been chatting in there, but we had forgotten about him.
\"If something like this happens again, I'd rather you kill me!" He looked at me with love and anger, and suddenly hugged me tightly, almost suffocating me. Then, a liquid fell on my shoulders, which was hot, and he cried out of fright...
"A year later, I am single again, living a calm life.
Occasionally, someone will come close to me and try to understand me with a loving look. Sometimes I vaguely think that he is his substitute. He can't bear to leave me and comes back to see me. As soon as he calms down for a moment, I feel a sense of betrayal. He is not him, but I am still me. The definition of love only applies to him. Slowly, I learned to tease others about their feelings, use an indifferent tone, and talk about feelings with friends as a bystander, but they were all other people's, and mine was blank.
I often wake up at night as before, sometimes I haven't slept at all, and I will habitually look at the empty pillow next to me, even though his body temperature and body odor have long since disappeared. When I am tired, I will curl up habitually, but I don't have his arms as my pillow... The alarm clock has become my best friend. It wakes me up on time every day instead of him. Sometimes I can't help but lift the quilt to expose myself, but I wake up in an instant.
Now, one year later, I still use the mobile phone he gave me, and I often receive text messages from friends and relatives, but not from him. Sometimes I go to remote places, and I also go to the basement of my previous friend, but I always come back in a hurry, waiting for him to send me a text message or a call from him.
One year and 25 days ago, I hugged and kissed him goodbye at the door as usual, continuing our daily habit.
That day he was going on a business trip with a colleague, and it would take three days before he could come back. We had never been apart for three days, so we were really a little bit reluctant to leave, so we spent three hugs that day. He smiled and said, "I want to enjoy the hugs tomorrow and the day after tomorrow."
On the way, he sent me two text messages: Honey, we have left Beijing, and I start to miss you.
Baby, this is a mountain road and the signal is not very good. I'll call you again in the evening.
Then, I happily waited for his call, waiting...
But I never waited.
Later, I called him, "Sorry, the user you called is not in the service area
" I started to call his work, his colleagues, bosses, friends, and the homes of colleagues in the same industry, looking for everyone who might be able to contact him. However, everything was in vain. , I suddenly felt like I was being thrown away from the world, as if I was flying out of the earth. I couldn't find him, and I couldn't find myself. 23 hours later, someone told me, who was almost crazy: "When I made a sharp turn, because of my unfamiliarity with him, I couldn't find him." The car collided with another car and went down the mountain. Two of the three people traveling with him never came back, and one of them could never stand up. I didn't cry when I sent him away, and I don't cry now. I was waiting for his call later. , I searched for his cell phone for two days at the foot of the mountain, but couldn't find his mobile phone.
...
I pay for him on time every month, and I call his cell phone once a day and send a text message.
Every time, my love responds to me, "Your user is not in the service area."
