100 Apologies [Reposted from Baidu Tieba]

Today was the midterm exam, and school let out a little early, so I called him.

- Hello, school lets out early today; can you come pick me up?
- Sure, give me five minutes.
- Five minutes? My school is right next to your house.

- I need to freshen up a bit.
- Alright, hurry up.

At 2:00 PM, the sun was so strong that I felt like my nose might bleed. I stood in the shade of a tree, waving my hands around; although it didn't really cool me down, fanning is better than nothing.

Five minutes passed, and he still wasn't here. I checked my watch, feeling a bit unhappy. Ten minutes passed, and he still hadn't arrived... Could something have happened? Ugh, bad luck... Fifteen minutes later, he finally showed up.

- Why are you so slow?
He looked indifferent and said, "Nothing, just watching TV."

What? Watching TV? Do you want to take a nap, shower, and eat first before coming? I said nothing, put on my helmet, and glared at him, refusing to get in the car.

- Sorry.

It was the first time he had ever said sorry to me. He was very macho and proud, so he never bowed to a girl to say sorry. I looked at him, and okay, he seemed remorseful. I put on my helmet and let him take me home.

He was always like this: never explaining, never arguing, never fighting with me, only saying sorry. Some things can't be solved with just an apology, but since he apologized, I didn't pursue it further. He said I was the first girl who got him to say sorry.

Admitting faults takes a lot of courage, but he never corrected his mistakes. “Sorry” gradually became just something to appease me. By the time he said "sorry" for the 59th time, I started crying, lowered my head, and said: "Don't say sorry to me again. If you can't change, don't let me give you chance after chance, expecting you to change." He held me gently and said his 60th "sorry."

Even so, he still didn't change, didn't explain anything, and I began to suspect he was hiding something from me.

- What's been going on with you lately?
- Nothing.
- Then why are you in a bad mood?
- Nothing.
:No, huh? Besides this sentence, do you have nothing else? Do you know I'm very worried and insecure? Do you even consider me
\ your girlfriend?
:... I'm sorry. :I don't want to hear you say sorry. I hung up, but he didn't call. He didn't care about me at all. Maybe we should end this.......... This is the 99th sentence he said, right?

Starting from.... From that day on, I never contacted him again, and he never called me. Sometimes, I would receive a silent call, but after a few 'hellos', I hung up. I had a gut feeling that it was him, but why didn't he say anything? A month later, unable to contain my longing, I decided to go to his school to find him. I looked around outside the classroom but couldn't see him, so I randomly picked up a boy to ask. :Student, may I ask, did Mengwei come today? :He took a leave of absence. :Huh? Why? When did this happen?
: He hasn't come for a month.
:... Oh... Thank you. A month... A month without coming, how could this be? I staggered back home: Dialing his phone: Your number has been forwarded to your voicemail, please tap again... I hung up and called his place, but it rang for a long time with no answer. How could this be? Is the whole family emigrating? He seemed to have vanished from this world, leaving no trace. Could it be that he has found someone new? I started to let my mind race. I couldn't find him... Just as I was feeling troubled, the phone suddenly rang. It was Ali calling, Mengwei's best friend and my friend.

:Hello, what are you still doing?
:What?

:ㄚWei is at the hospital.
:Really? What's wrong with him?

:No, he's at ○○ Hospital, the same place you stayed at last time.
:I'll go right away. I immediately sped to the hospital at the fastest speed I've ever had. There, I saw his **** and his mother. I asked them which hospital room he was in, then hurriedly ran away. He lay on the bed, eyes fixed on me, silent, not getting up, not moving at all. :Hey, what's wrong? Why didn't you tell me?He didn't answer me, he just kept looking at me with the same expression.

“Answer me, why aren't you speaking?”

A tear fell from the corner of his eye. It was as if he was using all his strength to move the corner of his mouth.

“…I'm sorry…” After saying that, he closed his eyes.

“Hey, stop pretending, okay? Why are you saying sorry? I don't want you to say sorry. Get up, answer me.”

I collapsed by his bedside, crying and pulling at his clothes, shouting: “Why did you say sorry? You don't even have a reason to convince me? I will not forgive you. Get up. Saying sorry is useless. If you don't get up, I will never forgive you in this lifetime. I beg you… open your eyes…”

That was the hundredth “I'm sorry” he said… A group of doctors and nurses pulled me away and started resuscitating him. I had no strength to get up; my mind went blank, and everything in front of me turned pitch black.

He didn't leave this world; it's just that I can never touch him again. But sometimes he still appears in my dreams, telling me how he is doing.

He still stays with me, he's still alive. In my heart, he's still the same as before, still smiling and calling me Yongxi, calling me his wife. It's just… he no longer says sorry to me…

A few months later, his mother came to me and gave me a box. Inside were a hundred photos, each with something written on the back that had made him upset.

The first sorry: ‘Wife, I wasn't intentionally late today. I know my reason is lame, but I really couldn't bear to tell the truth. I suddenly had a heart cramp before heading out, but I tried my best to rush. Can you forgive me?' The second sorry?Wife, I..........
Third time saying sorry, wife, I...
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One hundredth time saying sorry, wife, I don't mean to cruelly leave you, it's just that it seems God didn't give me the chance to love you for a lifetime, to put a ring on you. You are the first girl I said sorry to, and also the first girl I wanted to spend my life with. Forgive me for not being able to give you happiness. I will turn into an angel, guarding you, watching you find happiness. Promise me, don't cry. I don't want to see you withering away and shedding tears because of me. I love you. Bye, Mengwei

How could I possibly not cry? Your request was too harsh. The last photo was taken by him in the hospital; in the photo he smiled brightly. He had become so thin, his face so pale, but he still showed a smile, taking the hundredth photo.

When he was at his weakest and in pain, I wasn't there with him.
I'm sorry.
I hold his photo, tears streaming without end!!